What's that you do when you're suddenly going through an emotional overflow? I thought I'd write it out, because that's how I'd feel better and weird thoughts must always be discarded as soon as possible. You can't afford to let them germinate inside you, because they'd just grow, feeding on your anxiousness and sadness. That's a simple philosophy I have, keep in the good thoughts, discard the bad. I've just realized that how you discard them, is something you have to think about. I spent about half an hour in total, thinking about exactly what to write on. Should it be on happiness, or friendship or another Mixed Signals something, but honestly, it's hard to point at one single thing when you have thoughts about so many inter-related stuff. I don't think I want to write about friendship. I'm totally confused about it. Maybe I should let it rest, it's not really necessary to understand everything, right?
Then I thought I'd just log on to goodreads and read some quotes from the books I've read. I love goodreads, by the way, that wonderfully bookish website! As always, it managed to steer my thoughts in what I hope is the right direction. For one, I looked up quotes by Frances Hodgson Burnett, an author whose wonderful children's classics, The Secret Garden and A Little Princess are books that I think, are absolute treasures. I don't know why I love children's books most and those that have kids as protagonists. It seems more in sync with the real world than the other fiction books I read. Honestly, it's like children look at things from a far deeper perspective than adults can and personally, I find those books more satisfying than anything else. For instance, consider these lines from The Secret Garden:
“One of the new things people began to find out in the last century was that thoughts—just mere thoughts—are as powerful as electric batteries—as good for one as sunlight is, or as bad for one as poison. To let a sad thought or a bad one get into your mind is as dangerous as letting a scarlet fever germ get into your body. If you let it stay there after it has got in you may never get over it as long as you live... Much more surprising things can happen to anyone who, when a disagreeable or discouraged thought comes into his mind, just has the sense to remember in time and push it out by putting in an agreeable, determinedly courageous one. Two things cannot be in one place. Where you tend a rose, my lad, A thistle cannot grow.”
See? This is precisely what I had been meaning to tell someone, but I couldn't form the right words, in the right sense. This is also the reason why I love books! You read and you find your own feelings reflected in some lines, somewhere in between, in just the right manner. Read these lines again and again if you must, just remember to discard the disagreeable thoughts and immediately fill up that void with a courageous one, because one small thought that upsets you, if allowed to wallow inside, will create a mountain of negative things disturbing you and the people around, even those who're trying to help and those you're blind towards.
This second one is from A Little Princess.
“When people are insulting you, there is nothing so good for them as not to say a word -- just to look at them and think. When you will not fly into a passion people know you are stronger than they are, because you are strong enough to hold in your rage, and they are not, and they say stupid things they wished they hadn't said afterward. There's nothing so strong as rage, except what makes you hold it in -- that's stronger. It's a good thing not to answer your enemies.”
The third and final quote in this post is again, from A Little Princess and among the best lines I've read in a long time. It's quite simple, childishly innocent, but something I believe might be true, after all. I'm a believer in fairy tales.
“Perhaps you can feel if you can’t hear,” was her fancy. “Perhaps kind thoughts reach people somehow, even through windows and doors and walls. Perhaps you feel a little warm and comforted, and don’t know why, when I am standing here in the cold and hoping you will get well and happy again.”
Well, this is for all those I care about, or have cared about at some point. I may not be too verbal, but I do always wish when you're sad, that you'd be happy again. These lines just beautifully shaped my thoughts, in a way, something I hadn't been able to think before.
This is why I love reading, love stories and fairy tales and fantasy and fiction. These have amazing truths in them that you can't help wonder how they manage it. They have this amazing sense of power, so that you feel light and happy and second, you come to know that it's not just your life that's having problems. You're still much better off than many others and it would do you well to understand it. Enjoy your life to the fullest, while you still can! :)
PS- First week of college (which won't be over till tomorrow) was hectic and boring. Just the tiniest bit okay, but maybe not.