Read THIS First ..

Read THIS First..
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Monday, May 12, 2014

Whatsup???

This is the one one-word question I fail to answer, except with a copied-from-others' 'nothing much' or the lame 'fan', 'sky' and whatever I see when I look up. Who even invented this word, an adaptation of which is a fabulous chat messenger app? Anyway, I'm not really going to discuss this word, or any word for that matter. It's just been ages since I came here and even though I don't have a fantastic plan for a mind-blowing post, I figured I'd put in an update.   

I've mostly been home ever since I escaped finished college, going out only for small errands or to visit a friend/relative. Even though I am really exhausted having spent years going out every day (and you have to admit the past two years were particularly brutal), I miss the activity, mostly because I am one person who cannot feel at peace unless I'm doing something I feel is useful. It's not that I've been rotting at home. There have been some useful things I managed to do, and some things are part of a long process so they happen every day (like the job search and ridiculous conversations with the inner self, trying to figure out how to step out into the world), but even then, I kind of miss having to do assignments. o.O Am I full of irony or what? The kind of education we have always seemed dreary to me, but I'm fond of learning. And work. I want assignments. :| 

To stay away from being idle and having my head circling over the job search (who knew it was such a pain and getting to see such fake, over-confident profiles on LinkedIn?), one of the things I did was to sign up for three courses on coursera.org. It's an interesting site and the way they have everything "scheduled" and require students to submit assignments on time and everything, it feels good! The last three weeks were busy and a lot of fun, with a cousin’s wedding and then another little cousin’s birthday that we all planned. Since they were staying at our place, it wasn’t empty like it is on usual days, and with two amazing kids in the house who love to play cute, fun games, it was like a vacation spent at home.

I managed to write a little too (*grins sheepishly for not yet completing the last TT story*), but reading and writing have been low on the agenda for a while now. I’m trying to get those back on track though, or else I know my life wouldn’t be on the happiness path anytime soon! What do you think, how right is it to ask for your old life back? I miss being the I-don’t-care person I used to be. Despite losing a valuable loved one, I was still coping and happy. It’s like it’s fallen apart again and I’m having to re-do myself completely. They say we should accept the changes and move on, but you can't help wishing for the home to be full of talk and laughter again, to wake up and not worry about what you're going to tell people who think you're wasting your time because you left a job you didn't want. You still wish for courage and motivation you had, the effortless way you could write, the rigorous reading sessions you indulged in, the friends who left because of an illness. 

You look at old photographs and remember snippets of your past life that was a hundred times carefree than it is now. You wish for a laughter that isn't scared of waking up those who don't want it. You miss being bold, confident and just "you". You curse the systems and people who you feel pushed you into being who you've become, and then feel angry at yourself because you allowed it. I don't think it's wrong to feel like that. It's your life and your right to make it the way you want.

Things aren’t as strong as these words sound though. :P It’s cool. I guess it’s just a little lazy lately. I’ve piled up quite a bit of work for myself so I can spend time oozing out creativity, which I’d missed so much the past two whole years! I tried the pulp method in papier mache to make bangles and keychains.
 
A similar pink heart became a
keychain!
Bangles *_*














The bangles came out pretty good, for a first timer. They weren’t really smooth, but they looked pretty nevertheless. I gifted them to an amazing lady who is a God-send and always manages to make me feel a lot of things, the top-most being loved, respected, inspired, motivated and happy. The key chains went to a friend, and two of those kiddies at home. I’ve been thinking of getting more into crafts and learning new things to create. It’d be a good use of my time and I know I’d enjoy it. By the way, would you guys like to see short posts on the craft projects? I’m thinking of making some, like a couple of them I’ve done previously (the demon mask project and the wall painting one).

On another note, I’m having a hard time dealing with the fact that I’m 7 books behind schedule according to Goodreads. I mean, so hawww! Please suggest some nice, hard-to-keep-down books so I can catch up!   


PS- My new addiction: Playing UNO online because the kiddies have gone back and I’ve no one to play with! :P

12 comments:

  1. Contrary to you, I always seek idle time. For some reason, I love to lay back and do absolutely nothing. Such a lazy bum I am. :P
    Oh, those crafts turned out well. Would definitely love to learn making them.
    Have you tried Sue Grafton's novels? It's a series of crime fiction books starting from letter 'A' so there's 26 books to read. That should keep you busy.
    Enjoy the free days because they definitely won't last long. :D

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    1. I love that too, but without having to worry about anything :P
      Thanks! I enjoyed making them too *_*

      And yes, I have read Sue Grafton! A couple of them though. I found them kind of complicated, but I have an O is for something that I haven't yet read, good that you reminded me! :D

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  2. Yet another slice of life from you Ashna :)

    Unlike you I kind of love "nothing ness"so perhaps boredom is something I am yet to meet. But then you described it so well that I can actually feel it :/

    Our tastes are too different for me to suggest a book to you right now.. otherwise would have loved to share some of my latest finds... I am unable to finish all the back logs I have in reading !

    And that was some beautiful craft there... do share the tips.

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    1. Thanks for your sweet comment PT :) I seem to be the only one bored of nothingness? :P But I guess it's not nothingness I'm bored of, it's some kind of non-clarity :/

      Anyway, yep sure I'd share posts about those craft projects now! :D

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  3. While reading your post I was like omg she is talking about me!!! yes I am also in the same phase right now waiting for different gd-pi results for mba, I can so relate with you. I will just say that enjoy these free days as much as you can :)

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    1. Hey Pratibha! Waiting for GD-PI results is still cool, as compared to waiting for a job. It totally, absolutely sucks, not matter however positive you be about it :/ I want to be a kid again!

      And all the best to you for your results! Hope you do get through to a place of your choice and you enjoy it :)

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  4. 7 books behind? Mine is lot more! :( I am like, just not able to read much. No, I haven't gone illiterate :P Okay, lame. :-I

    Well, well, that is something nice, bangles! Send one to me too :P I have always been interested in crafts, and I even sit down to do them at times. But the lazy and clumsy lad that I am, it's either left incomplete or spoiled. :D Long vacation ahead, I'll take them up again.

    I loved this post, Ashna! Like always :D

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    1. Srishti!!!! What happened? :/ You'll never believe what is happening with me if I told you! (In fact I WILL share it with you!) Hope you get out of the not-so-happening phase soon. I bet you will. You're so jawan still :P

      And yep, why not :D I'd love to make them for you! I'd give you quick tips so you wouldn't have to sit for a long time and hence do awesome stuff quickly ;)

      I loved your comment, as always!! :*

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  5. Hey, I can totally relate to the nothingness leading to absolute boredom thing :X It sucks on a humongous level and you really miss being busy, even if that meant having unending work and assignments.

    I don't have to say anything on how difficult it is finding a job(even when there are thousands out there), everybody kinda knows. I just wish that you get the job where you can use your abilities and talents well and happily. and that you find it soon ^_^

    Oh and I really loved those papier mache things. I would have said all of them but one particular was a little more loved than the others ;) Between, I forgot to ask this earlier, how did you mange to attach those crystals(or whatever they are called :P) into the red bangle? Were they just glued or was some pin attached to those that went in?

    P.S: I am totally up for craft project posts, they would be exciting I think(girly much? :P)
    Also, something tells me you would make a really good video crafts tutor/presenter. Do try making a youtube video someday, maybe a 'how-to' on your much adored birthday cards ;)

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    1. Heyy!!! What are you suggesting? :O I never ever thought of that! I MEAN, the idea is appealing man! :D I COULD actually do that! YUSS! :D Thanks a ton! :D I'm definitely going to daydream over it now. :P

      As for those dark pink gems/whatever, they were simply attached there using glue. :) And then the whole thing covered in varnish, so it's waterproof and those gems safely stuck.

      Thanks so much for your best wishes dudo. They're always so motivating and helpful. :)

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