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Thursday, October 16, 2014

If I were a witch...

Disclaimer: By 'witch', I am not referring to any kind of society/group that exists. Here, witch is referred to in the fictional sense.


Actually, I AM a witch, if one were to believe my younger brother G. I was having one of those urges where tiny voices shout in your head, 'write! write! write!' but I didn't have much idea of what to write about. I asked G for a prompt and got this one.

'Write about how you are a witch...
Or what would you do if you *really* got the powers of a witch...
Or about how you hate muggles...'

He nearly earned a bone-crushing hug at that, but he's good at dodging such impulse-driven actions, so the moment passed. And I got this prompt.

When I started thinking about it, I realized that our siblings might be the only ones who know the facts about us, because the more I thought about it, the more I realized I really have the characteristics associated with a witch! Woohoo! Now, G might have imagined me as the hooked nose, black robe wearing, broom yielding witch we used to watch in cartoons, while I wanted to imagine myself as Hermione, but then, why not the traditional one? It's not that they were wicked most of the times. They were mostly shunned by society because everyone feared their knowledge and non-conformity to patriarchy. So if we go by a mix of the good and the bad, we can then look at me, and draw parallels. Let's begin:

# 1. Respect for brain power
Witches are said to hold deep, ancient wisdom and knowledge, especially when it comes to psychology and people. I'm nowhere close to wise, but I do have an interest, and a deep reverence for ancient knowledge and the powers of the brain. Calling oneself smart brain-wise would be preposterous, so I'd refrain from doing that publicly (no matter no one reads this anyway, and no matter how true it is!), but I have to say it's a big, big wow factor above all else. If you tell me you've invented something, that would be the most attractive thing you could say. ^_*

# 2. Intolerance for stupidity
We're all stupid, but some transcend the basic levels and stay high up on the idiocy radar, so that no matter what they speak, it always sounds stupid. And that's what people with agendas relating to doing something awesome, are intolerant to. Sorry, but if you act stupid, we don't. have. the. time. for. it. Goodbye!

# 3. Muggles. -_-
True, everyone could not have been born with magical gifts (kindness, empathy, common sense, to list a few), so there would always be those who either are always harping about the same old things all the time, or those who lack security in their lives and instead of coming to terms with it, they make things miserable for others. Those who fall in this category are muggles, and I wish we could just concoct a brew with pig-tails and salamander nails for ingredients and give it to them, so they can drink it and attain nirvana or at least get better. But alas, forcefully attempting to heal people is not allowed, and in case of witches, it's unlawful! Huh. Proof that the world is overflowing with muggles.

# 4. Living for yourself first
I so miss the time when people were not into social media. I do, I do, I so do! Staying away from it is not the solution, in case you were about to suggest that, because in that case, I'd be left with stray dogs for company, who happen to be the only beings not yet ensnared by it. Even cats have a huge following. But I suffer from dogophobia, and even if I continue my 'no-more-than-half-hour-of-FB-a-day' streak (which, by the way, has made my life much awesomer), I'd still wish we could go back to the good ol' days. :') I think I digressed from the point, but not much. I do prefer to live away from all the noise that internet causes, what with information overload about *the* most crucial things we might miss. Just like those witches feel energized with natural elements like water and the good ol' countryside, I wish I could live like that now. Too old for all ze jazz.

# 5. Seemingly scary to people
This is my favourite. :') I can make people think I'm a scary person; that I'd snap at them if they cross me for any reason, even though that's far from the truth. I used to get annoyed by this earlier, but hey, it's saved me from a lot of disgusting stuff. Annoying kids in school, for example. More annoying people after school, and anywhere else, basically. Don't want to talk to someone? Your poker face would keep them away. Yay! 

It's not really that bad, you know? Heck, I love it. That leaves only a few people who know you for you, who know what your expressions - scary or not - really, really mean, and that makes them really, really special, innit? :')

# 6. Rebellious
After all the time I've spent trying to 'repair' this thing, I've finally accepted it as an inherent thing in me. It just comes naturally and I can't help it. In fact, I wouldn't mind if you call me sadu on my face (wait. You already do -_-), because that's how I am. I hate a lot of things, and don't you go telling me how I need to accept everything, because you have to see that the things I hate actually are hateful, okay? I hate having people around who don't mean much to me (probably why I avoid social gatherings), I kind of hate having someone tell me what to do (in that 'I-know-everything-you-don't-know-anything way) and I hate how books without anything to learn from, except a two minute entertaining thought, are having a huge market. And as for people...

# 7. Independence
Continuing the saduness, I hate being dependent on someone for most things. The top-most reason I love Scoot is because of the independence it offers. No more flagging down riksha/auto-riksha/whatever if you can travel all by yourself. If I could cook (believe it or not, I actually want to learn cooking now), I'd do that myself too. Like all witches who happily do all that they can themselves, I prefer doing the same.

# 8. Carefree
I used to be carefree till about two years ago, after which I was thrown into hell a place that sucked it all out. Now I'm going back to being awesome again, so I guess I can count that too. 
Caring about what people think about how I look/talk/do things? Nah. 
Caring about doing things just so it looks 'nice'? Nah.  
Caring about how some people might think you're selfish? I seriously don't care. 
It's not that I've turned mean, but I'm just preferring my own likes/dislikes. It's important to know myself better, and this is a part of it. So deal with it.

There could be more similarities, as G very helpfully pointed out.
Witchie much?
"You're a sadist... but I think you're a cute sadist. Then, umm... you're also like... who's that guy in Germany? Hitler! You're dictatorial. You're also clever, and loud, and you like to travel to places so you wish for a broom like a witch's (my comment: yusss!) and well, I've always said you look like a... "

By this time, I'm not listening. These are enough for now, don't you think? When I Google searched witches, I got really serious stuff, but I'm limiting myself to the casual witch reference. Y'know, that's more... sadu sounding. ;)

Go ahead. Call me a witch. Proud to be one. ;) 

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