It's the last day of the year...

... And I couldn't be happier about it! I don't know if people get sad over the passing of the year. I usually don't and this time I most certainly am not. I'm more than just glad. Relieved, more like. 

2013 was weird. Confusing. Muddling. Mind boggling. Sort of depressing. Non-creative. Irritating. I'm-just-going-to-stay-silent. 

But it wasn't just all that. People can roll their eyes or whatever, however much they want but for me, the negatives outweighed the positives, although the positives were those with such strength that they enabled me to sustain myself and even have fun, and made me hold on to that little spark of hope that keeps you moving, making you believe in the ultimate, 'it's okay.' On the good side, I met people I found I could be comfortable with, around whom I did not need to pretend, with whom I could speak my mind and not be thought of as a nerd or a weirdo or a person with thoughts bordering on extremities. I visited good libraries, read books I learned so much from, although for a long time I fell into a reading slump from which I'm still recovering. I hung out at CP more than ever and now I'm not afraid to wander in its complexities. It's a beautiful place. I have a lot of amazing things to talk about this year, but that is for another post to come soon. Preetika sent me 7 prompts to write on, via post, and all of them are challenging yet so exciting! I wanted to write one yesterday based on the year that passed, but I had to collect various pieces of winter clothing to pack and put in a small suitcase. 

I'm glad 2013 is over because I did not like it. Now it feels serene and peaceful, albeit a little bit musty, as I'm sitting in a train that's running through the fields towards Punjab, a place I admire just for its gaiety, openness, greenery and lush fields. I would be using the Blogger app to post this but I'm typing this in the Notes section, having my trust being misplaced when I wrote one line and minimized the app, only to later find it gone. -_- My seat is placed in a way that I'm going backward, watching the old pass by in a rush. And it's awesome because I am actually moving, for three days, and it seems like a real-life metaphor. You're running backwards, watching everything stagnant or slow sit idling in their own style and comfort. It feels good to see landscapes you hardly get to see, glimpses of life so beyond the ordinariness of our metropolitan life. Bye-bye old, welcome new! 

I have been having a very good feeling about the next year being awesome. I feel so worn out with this year that there's this gladness and excitement inside related to the New Year. Like everything is suddenly going to be amazing, more beautiful, easier, more knowledgeable, more clarity, lots of exciting things lined up! The most important of all, I would be finishing my formal education three months into 2014. I'm not yet sure about more studies, that talk is for later. But things related to general life seem to be on the brighter side. I'm oh-so-hopeful! 

My last book of the year is The Timekeeper by Mitch Albom, suggested by Priyaa. It is a uniquely written book that has given me a lot to think about. It's about time, and Father Time and how present day people treat time, how they were made to learn the importance of not meddling with time. It tells us how we stopped living less and suffered more once we started measuring time. It seems like a myth, a tale weaved with examples of present day people, but I could draw parallels with my life. I wish we did not live so much by the clock. As far as I can, and as much as is in my control, I would like to give myself this liberty. Those are small things, but they matter a lot. 

I feel weird calling this a blog post. This is equivalent to a comprehensive reply I give on the phone. :P But I type better (and more) with a laptop. Plus, I just had to make an update, a small mark to mark the last day of this year. Those amazing prompts would come up in January! I should now take out Frostbite (Vampire Academy #2) and 'finally' get to reading it. I'm excited about welcoming the New Year sitting in the peaceful premises of Golden Temple at midnight. *drools and daydreams* Hopefully around the sarovar. *hyperventilates!* :D

Wishing all you beautiful, creatively awesome people a very Happy New Year! May the year be filled with laughter, wonderful experiences, awesome friends (and here I can say I am endowed with the best people in my life! :D ), many celebrations, books and many forms of art, beautiful places and lots of happiness. ^_^ 

See ya in 2014!! :D *_* 

PS- I can't find the Justify option in this app -_- 

Metro Diaries #5: Metrocious!

I don't think there is a limit to my weirdness. Or impulsiveness. First off, I switched on the laptop for some work. Then I thought 'let me make a random post about nothing and everything happening'. At the last second as the cursor started blinking in the title bar, my index finger found the 'M' and my mind (without even asking me! -_- ) decided to write something on the Metro travels. It's been too long since I've talked about it, yes, but I've already talked about it so much. But no. Since I'm not doing the right kind of meditation taught by a young prof in college, what he calls as transcendental meditation, that allows our soul to calm and control the mind, my mind is squiggling free and not just listening to me. Fine. Whatever you say Mindey. (That's the name. Mindey. :P Hey P! How d'you find this name? *laughing out loud*)

I'll "try" making this a short post but you never know with me. :P 

The past few weeks have been quite weird when it comes to my Metro travels, if we talk about my near-zombieness when I'm in the Metro. Maybe because it's become too routine, even when half of the days I can be found pacing and running in a very PT-Usha-will-get-a-complex way. It's okay dudes. If it hadn't been for all the rushing, I wouldn't have been as fit as I'm now. Nor would the Metro aunties get to enjoy live entertainment as they see me dramatically take deep breaths and drinking water and coughing and letting my bag slip to the floor with a thud as I finally board the train. (I hope you did not imagine me like that. I was kidding. I'm not that dramatic. At least on some soulless days I'm not.)

But for the most part, it's routine, even the rushing. Fortunately, a morning crowd or technical problems are not all that routine, though they're more frequent than I would have liked. For instance, that day when we had an end-semester exam and I very conveniently decided to skip the morning class so I could sleep in a little, have a clear head for an exam I hadn't read a word for, and go to college leisurely. Of course, I was still mysteriously ten minutes later than the 'should be' time, and got a message of foreboding while huffing and panting and climbing the stairs of my station, announcing an impending technical difficulty in the system looming ahead. Even though that paper was kind of useless, I still needed to pass it well (because under no circumstances what-so-ever can I come to study here once I'm finished with MBA). And being late would not be good! 

The platform was jampacked and however much of a SuperGirl I am, it made me experience a minor panic attack. There could be no way I would be able to board a train in this situation. I mean, it was pretty evident there hadn't been a train there in ages. There was no clue as to when it'd come next. There were hordes of people tightly strung together on the platform. Total scare-material. 

I made my way towards the first coach-platform and my heart sunk even lower, because of course most women prefer the first coach (and who wants to glide and slide among guys in an insane crowd? *shuddering* at the thought). Although I did get to learn crucial life lessons that day. 

# 1: Patience helps: I'm almost always really patient. That day, if it hadn't been for the exam, I would have been even more patient, but still, I was quite patient nevertheless and decided to not follow dad's advice (over the phone, near-hyperventilation when I conveniently told him I also have an exam) to take an autoricksha instead. Well, for one, my college's too far and two, I don't know the way via road, apart from a vague guess. And I would so not be travelling in that vehicle on my own -_-

After about 15 minutes, a train came in and the tangible, collectible sigh of relief and pumped up hormones was so visible that I could have captured it in a camera, if only my phone's camera worked. Of course, being able to get in that train was an unimaginable thought. One, we could see people's bodies glued to the train's interior and so many inside that it was a clear breach of the maximum capacity of the train. But *sigh*, this happens. As I spied the doors from a distance, hoping against hope that soon more trains would follow, I saw people tumbling out and breathing in deeply, as if the polluted Delhi smog was heaven. Actually, to them it might just have been. Barely two people squished inside and clung to the other women, barely saving their backs from being hit by the closing doors. 

People went back to their usual stance once the train was gone. Staring at others, staring at their smartphones, staring unseeingly in the distance, standing on tiptoe and leaning forward over the edge of the platform hoping to see a sliver of silver in the distance. I went back to Whatsapping my folks back in college, updating them about the 'situation' and asking them to plead with the teacher on my behalf, just to let me in somehow. It was half an hour past now. Another train rolled in. Just as I heard a group-shriek, I looked to the right to find females from all ages, actually tumbling out of the coach, slipping and then falling over each other. Some aunties had agony pained over their faces and I felt bad for them, but some young ones found it to funny and fought to hold back snickers :P

I missed three more trains before I realized I could not stand there all day and planted myself in the front-crowd and waited for the next to arrive. This seemed relatively more free and as the doors opened and a couple of women stepped outside gratefully, I glided got pushed inside and realized that it wasn't really as free as it seemed. Arms pinned to my sides, my face was assaulted with n number of different hairdos, the most irritating of which is the high ponytail (and tends to be sported by those with spiky, rough hair!). 

# 2: You don't know which is worse in a crowd: stuck among both genders and breathing in foul smells or being squeezed to asphyxiation among all women? The second one maybe. Being all-women gives everyone the freedom to glue themselves to others, to make 'space' for aunties and girls-who-act-like-aunties, to take your hair away from you, and leaving their chunni stuck to your bag. Somehow I managed to inform dad I've boarded the train and kept the fone in an inside pocket for double safety. The notes I had managed to squeeze in with me rested somewhere near my thighs, dangerously close to getting torn and stamped on. I found myself a metre away from where I was originally standing as the train passed the stations and women pushed inside with amazing power and prowess. You thought there isn't any more space? Ha ha. Can't you see that inch? You sure can 'adjust' an aunty there!

But the first coach isn't all that bad. I witnessed a sort of social dynamics and behavior example when a healthy, bold-looking woman stood near the doors and refused to budge when those at the platform tried squeezing themselves inside and retorted back with an appropriately worded and strong response, thus making us poor things stuck beside chameli-oil laden women breathe enough to survive. 

# 3: It's always okay: No matter how late you are getting, there's no point getting stressed over your situation, even when you might be regretting not having made a will yet, it'll be okay. You'll reach for your exam half an hour late and the teacher will say you'll not get extra time, you'll see your classmates leaving class way before the allotted time ends and you decide that the exam might not be that hard after all and end up writing it coolly, leaving 40 minutes before it was 'supposed' to end! Ha! There's nothing that disastrous that can happen, so even when you're so tightly squashed among unidentifiable women that you might just as well take both your feet off the ground and you still wouldn't fall or budge, look around at people's faces. Seriously. Change my name if it doesn't make you laugh. ;)

***

PS- Random advice: Don't ask mom to give you something when you're hungry. If she makes pasta, there will be more mattar and corn than pasta. If you ask for namkeen, she'll give you a bowl of sprouts with a little bit of namkeen barely visible in it. -_-

PPS- Don't write such ^ lines before tasting those sprouts. They would be yummylicious! And yes, she'd also get a bowl of just namkeen along with it. ^_^

Paintgirl Chronicles # 3: Designing and Finishing!

For those who remember, my walls got painted on October 13! I'm just posting this more than 1.5 months late. Apologies, apologies. For the new smarties who're now reading my blog, I utilized my Autumn break to paint two walls in my room. All by myself (helped by my family, of course). Thanks, I know I do really cool stuff. 8|

This is the third and the final part of the series (you can see the previous parts here and here). I mean, I was so exhausted when it was finally done, that I had no energy left to post about it. It's okay. Even though Paintgirl has amazing powers, she can run out of them sometimes. And then college re-opened and you know the rest. Writer's block, etc etc. Anyway, coming to the awesome part, I love the new walls. Not only are they painted in pretty shades of pink, we designed a tree at the intersection of those walls too! I can certainly certify it with a guarantee stamp that painting three coats each on two walls over two-three days won't make you feel as tired and exhausted as painting a tree for three hours straight would.

Paints and colors: We used oil paints, the kind usually reserved for painting on wooden and iron surfaces. Don't ask why. The Paint bhaiya said they'd be good to use and I could just trust his judgment. It was fun to work with, true, but since they are 'hard' and thick, they take more efforts. Plus, you'd have to use thinner brushes for painting leaves and outlining and the details, so it'd take even more time and effort. But I think I get why he suggested oil paints. They stick well and don't leak, which the normal paints would have done. Lesson to be learned: Always trust those who are making their living through a certain trade. They do know it well. ^_^ 

Enamel paints and stainers

Coming to colors, we had black and white enamel paints, along with brown and green stainers (as you can see in the above picture). These stainers can be mixed in the white enamel in any quantity you prefer, depending upon the shade of the color you want. For example, I had two different containers for light brown (with a little less amount of stainer mixed in white enamel) and one for a darker brown. Similarly, two shades of green (considering a mono green shade for all leaves would be boring!). 

Making the design: If it isn't too complex a design, you can straightaway stroke with your brush! But if you have any sliver of doubt and don't want to waste your three-days' hard work labor by making a wrong stroke, you may make a pencil design first as a base for the paint and brush. I tired making it too, but then my childhood's awesome creative avatar took over and went beyond the pencil stencil and made strokes on its own. I knew it's going good when mom entered after about an hour and exclaimed an appreciative and incredible "Wow". :D Although, you would always need someone else to stand at a distance and tell, because being on a ladder and being inches away from the design, you wouldn't really know about the overall structure. 

I made the tree trunk using the light colored brown, and then the branches, adding light green leaves at intervals. Then I mixed more stainer to have a darker green and made dark green half-boundaries on the leaves. The previous day on impulse, I had got some pretty golden paint and on another impulse, painted the other half of the leaves' border with gold. It looked quite good! I was exhausted and finally slumped back, not wanting to do any more, abandoning my plans of making those concentric circle designs on the trunk. My mom, with a little help from dad the next morning, secretly put an outline on the trunk and branches, making it look perfect and complete. What-e-morning surprise! :D

Overall! :D

                                 

Finishing: That was the last day of my holidays and we didn't have any time to do more, so the day was spent cleaning the floors, and other places where random paint was spotted. A few days later the bookshelf was put back and the room returned to it's part-messy normalcy. And then I had a lot of awesome gifts from awesome friends that would be framed and put up on the dark colored wall, which would make this look even more cool! :D

^_^

Basically, this is how it looks now. What do you think of it? ;)  

Some Awesomeness!

Y'know you're a goner, a pure victim of injustice if you're in a college where they take your Sunday and exchange it with a fully packed day and you still go to every single class because one, attendance issues and two, you're saving the holidays for later. You have any idea how such 14 days can be? 14 straight days of classes from 8.30 to 5.30, with every single class requiring you to take some tests or assignments or presentations or cases? Total stupidity. So when a teacher takes mercy and postpones his assignment's due date and you get one day when you don't have any submission the next day, you're so confused that you don't know what to do! You feel sleepy but you feel that'd be wasting time :P You sit down to send sane replies to pending emails, you feel emotionally awesome because an email would be from someplace you don't know, sent by a person you don't know, saying how they can connect to what you write and what they feel about it. That is when you feel like you're actually achieving your goals in small increments, because that is what you really wanted. :D

Anyway, that is also the time when you know you desperately want to blog but you're in no state to think and write. You would then consult your writer-friend and he'd give you a really awesomely weird prompt. This is what I got as a prompt:

"Write ten things about yourself that make you so proud that you want to hug yourself!"

Source: Google

Weird, right? :P I actually had to consult this friend who gave no more than one point, saying 'You're supposed to do this yourself.' Consulting with mom led to simple but cool answers (and I feel awesome my mom thinks so ;) ) And as much as I believe and think we're supposed to stay humble and not mumble (it's okay dudes. We are allowed to write words just to make them annoyingly rhyming :P ), I also feel like doing some self-motivation thingy and list some things about myself I feel are awesome! ;) I mean, it's cool, you guys. Please don't run off to the International Commission for Searching and Awarding Insanely Awesome People to nominate my name. I'm above all such materialistic stuff. ;)

# 10: I love to read. Many people love to read, I know, but I love it. I love more the fact that I have been reading ever since I could. In a place where there is hardly any culture of bedtime reading, I'm lucky that even as a kid I had the brains to read books my age :P (Yeah, it's obviously because of my parents who encouraged me, but still). I read children's stories and classics when I should have, Enid Blyton and Nancy Drews, and yep, I was 12 when I started reading the Harry Potter books, so that is awesome! And people who read are nevertheless awesome just by virtue of being readers, so that's an added plus!

# 9: I have amazing blogs. And I find them amazing because I completely adore them. This blog contains my evolution as a person, witnessed through the stories I've typed here. This is where I have always come when I needed to bring something off my heart, where I felt awesome while writing. This here, my second baby, is where I can freely (and super-enthusiastically) talk about my favorite topic: books. And it led me to many more book lovers, including an amazing girl from another country who is now a pen-friend. :D These blogs are not popular, nor do I wish for them to be. Popularity brings with it too much noise and distractions and yes, spam, and I'm better off without having to deal with those. ;)

There's one fact I love about these two blogs, that I don't actually do a rigorous promotion for them, because of which they tend to have people who are genuinely interested. This holds more true for the book blog, because I'd rather have a few reader, book-lover, genuine review-seekers to be on my blog than many random people just because I know them from somewhere. Genuineness adds such a feel-good factor! :)

# 8: I'm one of those 'old-school' characters. I've never really understood the term properly, but despite being the kid of the 21st century, brought up in co-ed educational backgrounds, among super-fast technological developments and super-fast people, I'm the kind of person who'd have been happier living in 'the good old times'. I rarely identify with the modernities, I refuse to believe in changing roles and behavior of people where everyone is convinced that being fast and chant is the way to success. I'd prefer to go slow and steady in any kind of relationship. I'm aware of everything new and modern, but I'd rather not live that way.

# 7: I love writing. It's one activity that never makes me feel jumpy or anxious when I have to do it. I feel nervous about a lot of things, including group activities in class, presentations, and wherever else I'm supposed to answer. But that's not the case with writing. It's something I've always been comfortable with. I don't write great, I don't have a good vocabulary, but I'd just always prefer writing in simple words (because okay, no great vocab -_-) for everything I need to convey. Well, maybe not everything, but most of the stuff. I was that weirdly awesome kid in school who loved English classes and looked forward to them; the one who loved doing grammar exercises, who never had trouble writing answers, who wrote short essays that got read in class. :D #nerd mode on. 

# 6: I don't get bored. Seriously, that makes me a boring person for others but I don't get bored myself. :P There's always some thing roaming around in my head, for my brain never sleeps, and if there's nothing (or no one :P ) interesting enough to observe, there'd be whole sentences forming in my head, as if it's writing a book on its own. It's crazy, but I love it. Considering how I anyway don't get much time to write, at least my brain has taken it upon itself to practice. ;) And yeah, lack of boredom tends to make you patient because you're not restless when nothing interesting is happening around you. 

# 5: I have interesting interests. Y'know, they're interesting to me. The thing I've noticed about people who're patient, and weird and fun, is that they have interests outside or not strictly based on their main area of academics. There has always been something I've had when I got bored of studies. Books, art and craft, some online course, blogging, learning and practicing photography, reviewing books, collecting clothes' tags, etc. One more reason I can't get bored! 

# 4: I'm 16% tomboyish. Mostly girls might not like to call themselves tomboyish and count it as an 'awesome' thing about them, but duh. I feel awesome when guys in class play cricket and I can ask for an over to bat, when we have a fun play-thing and I am the rare girl who actually can bat and ball and catch (seriously. Some don't even know how to hold a bat. o.O ). I loved my childhood days when I played with G all sorts of games; cricket (how I loved it), basketball (making a swiveling motion and saying 'Basket!' was awesome), cycling (I still would run off on a bicycle if useless dogs don't run after me), skating, taking the remote controlled Renault awesome car to the park and operating it with ultimate cool-girl attitude, etc etc. I can seriously go on and on. :D 

# 3: I'm kind of above the trivial things. I don't mean to dismiss those who do talk about such stuff, but for me it's cool and I feel awesome that I can't be bothered about little things like who's hot on TV, or what's "in" in fashion, or how someone acted because someone told them how someone else said something about them. o.O This took a while to think to form the sentence, I can't imagine how people get the energy to gossip about it. I'd rather discuss the book I'm reading with someone who seems to understand. But when people themselves tend to be critical about everything, I don't feel like they'd understand the point and so I'm left with just a few who allow me that liberty. And I love it! :D

# 2: I'm the slimmer, older, pink-loving, cheesy version of an amazing girl with an amazing blog who happens to be one of the closest friends and my soul-sister. :) 

A note to those who don't believe in making friends online: I used to think like you too, and then I discovered blogging. And if you are at the right blog, you'd get to meet and talk to the most amazing people. Evidence is here. ;) I have awesome people in my life. Those who love me even when I seem to behave like the craziest person ever, who actually laugh at my jokes (and they are actually good if you have that awesome level of understanding 8| ) and these people include my family and best friends. Thank you guys. ^_^ 

# 1: I have faith in my dreams. Even though from where I am right now, I can't see the destination, I do know I'd get there. And I'd make most of the journey, because the means is important to me, not just the end. I make achievable goals and aspirations too. For everything I love. I always wanted to see more people reading, not just because "I" like it, but because it is an amazing thing. Sometimes unfortunately it might not work, if you ask and force someone to read a book, but I got to know how one can indirectly influence people and facilitate their discovery of books they love. Whenever someone says that they started reading more, or have read books based on my reviews, I have felt that feeling of success and happiness that I really can't describe. :)

***

I started writing this post almost a month ago. This prompt was given a month ago. After the introduction, I had points 10 to 1, numbers written. I did not know what to write, I couldn't figure out the awesome things about myself. Even today, I had to take help because I was sitting blank. I asked the two best people, I asked my mom (who invented a term called 'negative awesome things' because she wanted to point out the bad ones too -_- Thanks, mum.) and then when I finally started writing, it came to me. I have a lot more points in my head now!! And I can't really say a lot on it because the fact that I felt so good after so long, is something no one can understand fully. I just need to say Thank you to all who facilitated this. Keep looking out for more awesomeness! It's sure to come! ;)

Why you should like me for me!

The first obvious answer would be because I am, without a doubt, quite an awesome person. This isn't any observation, it is repeated-by-even-more-awesome-best-friends, who remind me of this fact all the time, especially when I get slightly put off by my sadu college. But I'm as such not talking just about myself here. I mean every single person (who isn't really a criminal or a crook or a mean kid in an MBA college. Okay wait, we can ignore the last category because..... well, just forgive them and hope they get better). We do realize how every one of us is different, and not just DNA wise. There is nothing called a 'wrong' person, we just have ideal people or characteristics or behaviour we want to see and judge people against them. Apart from the fact that I don't understand the logic behind the 'ideal' stuff, (because who is to say what is ideal? There are just basic, moral, ethical norms to be followed. Anything over and above is purely individualistic) I also don't like how we are naturally attuned to striking someone off just because they don't seem to follow the herd category. 

See? The picture says it too!
Pic source: Google j!

I'm not talking about weirdos. And this is actually a slightly demeaning word if you think about it. We just tend to use it for fun, I mean I call myself a weird girl - weirdly awesome, yes, but weird all the same - but by saying so we're saying they aren't 'normal'. How is 'normal' defined anyway? We live by the society and the majority thinking around us most of our young lives. We're small and we get influenced. We think and start believing in what we're conditioned to believe in. It is rare when someone starts questioning, thinking, wondering if what one's been told fits with one's own, individualistic thinking self. That is when you might realize that there is no 'ideal' as such. It's just the majority perception. Do you really feel that way too? Or are you scared to move beyond and over the generalized thought process, fearing you might be ridiculed too?

Alright, keeping weirdness aside, the basic point I wanted to make revolves around one strong characteristic I, and thousands of other people have: Introversion. I'm a very proud introvert. I love the fact that I don't have to openly display myself to the world just to feel good, that I don't speak words in a way that might be hurtful to someone, because that realization would just about make me feel bad about myself. I love the quiet way I get to live my life, the much-desired space and privacy I get, the way thoughts swoosh in at random and swirl and settle in my head, making me think of the many possibilities of how the world could be. I love how I can think over things properly and then make decisions, how I can sense a feeling without words, understand an expression without verbal conversations. I love how amazing people of the world are considered as introverts and how we have wonderful examples of awesomeness!

Did I always feel this way? No. Precisely because of how I've been constantly pushed, prodded (sometimes roughly) towards being 'more open'. I've been reminded ever since I was a kid that 'the world out there has no place for those who aren't outgoing', I got to participate in public speaking competitions (where by the way, I have performed well, but still), not out of will, but because people thought it'd do me good. This college has made me participate in thousands of group activities (when was the last time we had an individual assignment? I don't remember) and hundreds of presentations, and still I don't think I have become 'outgoing', as they'd been saying all this while. I sometimes feel incapable, precisely because people decided to overlook the soft skills and basic things like human character, for face value. I'm sorry. This whole process and mehnat has only made me feel bad and under-confident. As a kid, I used to be good at art and craft, reading and writing. I feel useless now since I can't draw a bird. I haven't read properly since months! 

Since I don't expect anyone to change this world-wide perception, it is up to me how to deal with it, the first step being understanding myself and looking at myself as everything I am, without the 'being outgoing' benchmark. Realizing my capabilities, I need to find out more people who are more aware and mature and not as ignorant as most of us are. I came across this wonderful book (about which I've talked before in a previous post), Quiet by Susan Cain, which talks about the power of introverts in a world that explicitly favors extroverts. Wanting to listen to a nicey TED talk today, I came across this author's talk on the same subject. I have to say it's brimming with awesomeness! A few key points I liked listening to include:

1. Leaders like Roosevelt and Mahatma Gandhi, among many others, were introverts. What they did was because they didn't have a choice, even when they didn't feel like being the centre of such attention, because they were driven to do what they thought was right.

2. The most creative people, although they seem to be good with people, have a most serious streak of introversion in them. Solitude is an important ingredient of creativity. It matters, it is like the air they breathe.

3. If we look at the major religions, all the seekers were going off by themselves, in solitude, and found revelations. Those are what they brought back to the society.

4. Although there is zero correlation between being he most extroverted and having the best ideas, the groups tend to go with the extroverts' ideas. 

5. Why do we make introverts feel guilty? Why has society always favored the man of action to the man of contemplation?

6. Social skills aren't unimportant, but the more freedom you give to introverts, the better ideas they'll get because they'd be in their comfort zone.

Food for thought? I feel there's still a long way to go. I'm just talking about myself here, and I know how I never liked my schooling (or college much) because I never felt 'in place'. I was doing things to 'keep up', to make myself more 'employable'. And in this process I have lost an invaluable part of myself and I utterly loathe this consequence. I'm happy though that there is talk about it, an effort to do away with this biased perception. My mom, a teacher for kindergarten kids, tells me how they do realize that every child is unique in their own self and they do let the quiet ones have their own space. They identify their talents and put them where they might be comfortable. At least for me, even such an effort is a relief, because I know how it must feel like when you're a kid constantly under a vigil eye, ready to pounce on you and prod you towards where you don't want to go. 

So yeah, if you can't look beyond 'top' performers as being verbal, loud and 'in your face', that is your myopic view of the world. There are thousands of awesome people out there, who are far better than the rest when it comes to using their brains, or being creative and coming up with ideas. More so, they're more likely to be better perceiving, understanding and simply, awesome!

***

When was the last time I posted anything? Almost a month! And it is all because I was being made to engross myself in a thousand group activities, exams, people, blah blah nonsense. The biggest point-of-cribbing in my life right now is not being able to read as much. I mean, the last book I read was completely read in the metro, while traveling to and from college. And they say college's going to be even more hectic now. Dude? I seriously don't want to live this corporaty life. I'm only losing myself gradually! You can almost see how I have to try hard to hold on to stuff like this, like posting a random post on my blog! I have so many drafts pending, you can't imagine! This would have been in the drafts too, had I not seen this video and forced myself to think and work towards holding on to things that matter. And now I feel awesome :D

PS- My birthday was awesome! ('T was on 9th, thanks for the belated wishes. I'm graciously accepting them :P ) Thank you dear blog, because of whom I got to make amazing friends who are actually reasons that I feel confident about myself, and less sucky and with the ability to deal with most kinds of nonsense. I owe you my happiness! :D

What I now know...

... and maybe I already did, but you can only learn without experience up to a limit. Then you're faced with different situations and you realize and accept things much better than how you did before. It's just that age thing, isn't it? Some things you just understand when it's 'time'. When I started writing on this blog, I was an energetic, excited, protected, fun-loving, eager-to-participate kind of a girl, fresh into college, wondering why one of my closest college friends didn't seem too happy, or as excited as I was about college. She said she didn't like the 'people' and the negatives emanating from them drained her. She even went on to say that "I" am the reason she's able to stay. I don't know if she would read this, but I have to say that it is now that I understand how she felt. I loved that college, more than what I showed and maybe it's because the present one makes me feel like the way she felt back then. I know now. I also know, or let's say, I understand these as well:

1. You know how there are some people who're kind of dominating? The ones who suck out your energy because the way they look at you contrasts with what they speak, and it's unnerving. Sometimes they're just mean, the bad thing being they don't realize it and the worst of it being when they do know it, yet they'd still deliberately make someone feel bad about themselves, or not participate in their happiness, or visibly show they don't like them. This scared me at first, wondering what kind of a conscience they might have. Do they even have it? Why isn't it capable of killing them from the inside? And I know it doesn't, because they continue living in their self-created high bubble, among other similar meanies who know nothing better than to simply follow the leader, because they forgot they have their own brains. Well done, meanies. Now I just feel sorry for you, for the immense lack of understanding about people and emotions you have, because you're just so self-centered. 

They make others feel like this sometimes. :|

2. Victims of such psychological bullying may experience a shift in their personality, not necessarily a happy shift, and one which involves them losing their confidence, interests in activities they liked, hatred for people, a reluctance to talk to new people. They lose friends because meanies, making full use of the 'smart' tactics and the fact that people are vulnerable when tensed and are totally fickle minded, are able to successfully bad-mouth those who're totally unaware of it. The even smarter ones might not bad-mouth them, but would anyway make the rest feel someone else is just not good, or right, or nice enough. Another thing I noticed was how your behaviour towards a certain person can shift dramatically because someone close to you shifts their behaviour too. 

Meaning, you make the rest into meanies too. BAD influence.

Consider this example: I've always seen my parents being 'nice' to people. Never a rude word or impoliteness. I was scolded when I even said, "I hate.. so and so". Mom practically got a shock, saying how you can't really "hate" someone, it is such a wrong thing to do. I decided trying to work around it, to see only the good in people and I did succeed to some extent. Anyway, that's a different point. A few days ago I saw dad pass only a half-hearted smile to a neighbour, and even that shocked me because I always expected him to be nice. I asked, half-angrily why he didn't greet him properly and he said how he doesn't like their habit of always parking wrong, despite reminders. The point is, I don't like to see them being rude, I wonder how many times did their heart feel sad to see me talking like that. Now whenever I see that neighbour, despite trying to not think about it, I do get a glimpse of his personality clouded by the fact that he never listens to the parking problems. See? I don't even know his name and I'm judging him. See how meanies can affect someone's image in the same way? I understand now how this works.

3. There's this teacher we have, a visiting faculty, who intrigues me somehow with the simple, people-based things he talks about and makes those as the basis for teaching the otherwise mundane subjects. Once in a class he made a comment about mean people. Or those who dominate to work their way up, making others feel like hell in the process. He said they're actually quite insecure. And the way insecure people work is that they make others feel insecure about themselves and use it to feel better themselves. I've compared this statement with some meanies. With the recent inability/disinterest in talking at all, I've observed more than ever and it seems to be quite true. You see it in the way they'd look. 'Expressions' are called expressions for a reason. They tell you 90% of the things that are unspoken and also when what one says is conflicting with what they feel.

4. You behave differently in front of people you're not comfortable with and those with whom you gel well. I know, it's obvious, but there's more to it. You even behave differently with strangers when you're alone and when you're with someone you "have" to be with but you're not the buddy-buddy kind. They dominate you. Think about it. Imagine one person who may be in your college, a classmate you feel those negative vibes with, but you're just going somewhere work-related with them. You meet a stranger, maybe someone coming up to you to ask if you know the place they're looking for. If you'd been alone, you'd have felt more 'free' and like your own self and you'd have smiled wide and helped them. If you're with the meanie, you'd feel self-conscious because that's how pathetically they make you feel. You'd mumble something and look away as soon as the stranger left. 

There's this saying, 'people won't remember what you did for them, but they'll always remember how you made them feel'. I couldn't agree more, because you do remember. That's the way you remember people. Think about your school. You remember the bully with a frown because he made you feel bad back then, you remember your best friend with a smile, or even that sweet, helpful girl in class because she was always polite to you and made you feel respected. 

5. This is something that needs to go out as a message, because some people don't just realize it. It is **extremely** important to express your feelings or your thoughts when someone does something and is expecting it. People aren't telepathic, they won't know what you think unless you say it. Most of all when it is expected. *Biggest examples*: Go back to what you learned in Kindergarten. Say 'please', 'sorry' and 'thank you'. Often. USE these words to express your wish, your guilt, your gratitude. "Gratitude" is what you should feel, not jealousy or hatred. Someone passes you a water bottle, say Thankyou. You make someone wait for longer, say a Sorry and mean it! If you're asking someone to pick up your chai from the canteen, have the courtesy to ask with a Please, instead of ordering them around. People don't really mind doing these little things, but the way you say it makes a difference. I know it now.

Seriously.

Though I don't mean that you say it to make them happy and get the work done, not really meaning it yourself. Because there would be some people not giving a damn to someone's existence but would come running with fake puppy-pathetic faces asking for help with extended 'please's and 'thankyou's. Not cool. Not cool at all.

But I also know that the way to deal with meanies is to not give them any kind of satisfaction, or the illusion that they've succeeded. No matter what happens, you have to forget they made you feel bad, you have to get over it asap because it is only you who's going to get affected and learn to block them out as much as you can. You realize that some people are just not the effort, or your time. You may have still been kind and good, trying to make things better yourself, but sometimes it's just not worth it because some people aren't going to change. Those who do, well and good. But if they don't, learn to ignore (and this works best) and talk to those who make you feel better. Indulge in activities you liked, it may be harder but think about it: no one can make you lose interest in things you love. How can you let them? Be persistent, be focused, ignore the small talk, focus on the big picture and move on. Life is beautiful, cut the weeds out of it as frequently and clearly as possible. :) Keep smiling. :D

***

I hope you survived the emotional ride and made it here. I always focused on posting energetic, happy stuff on the blog, wanting to make this a place where people connect and feel good about themselves and their lives, just by knowing there's someone just like them out here, not afraid to talk about her life. I restricted myself from posting serious stuff like this, but then I really wanted to share these thoughts and since they're a part of me, the not-so-perfect life I have, it's just to say I'm just an ordinary person trying to lead a simple, ordinary life, which in itself is quite extraordinary these days, don't you think? ;) This too, is a part of me. :)

PS- I haven't been referring to anyone as such. Nor have I been the victim in all cases. This is the result of being quiet lately and observing more than ever. :D Agree on any of these?

The Paintgirl Chronicles # 2: Coating Paints!

Ohmygod. Whatever presumptions I did have, I certainly did not think using a heavy brush and a bucket of paint would give me a body pain. -_- Those painter dudes are certainly tough guys, I know now. But no, I'm not complaining, because it's been (and still is) the kind of experience someone as crazy enough as I am would love to have. Despite the pain, the chanting of God's various names while precariously perched on top of the ladder (did I say perched? Cross that, standing with just plain walls for support, on which you can't even lean because one, they're newly painted and two, you'd just fall anyway), an overenthusiastic mom (who by the way, turned out to be an awesome Paintwoman!) I'm loving it! :D I'm kind of blocked right now and so I dunno how to go about this post, to include everything I've learned! I'm feeling like a hungry maJdoor (special emphasis on 'J'. Hi, munchkin! :P ) right now, waiting for tea, which I've consumed like... like whoever consumes tea all day long and I won't have time after this because I've gotta get started with the designing. :D

Things you learn when you get down to painting your room:

1. You thought you were enthusiastic, you wished your parents would get enthusiastic too. Dudes, whoever said 'Be careful what you wish for, it just might come true' was right. Half your time might be spent fighting with your mom at whose turn it is to use the brush. She might want to paint everything herself and give you the job of using the roller on the fresh paint so it gets even. She might reduce the number of breaks you have and make you get away from the technological gadgets you use for breaks. But it's actually something you enjoy. You realize all her ideas have wonderful results, she's an awesome Paintwoman, and has got an eye for colors and which area needs another coat. Trust her, people! Mother knows best. ;)

2. The first coat of paint would always be patchy and uneven. Even after it dries up. Even if it's a plain, normal wall without any internal past water seepage problem. :P It might look so bad that you'd think you shouldn't have taken the initiative after all. BUT no! You'd actually 'get' how to paint effectively so it doesn't make a patch by the second time around. And you'd be more careful. Just gently make horizontal strokes and then use a roller over them to make it smooth. You wouldn't know how it'd look like in the end, because it's very different when it's still wet, but the second time around you'd feel so amazingly proud of yourself!!! It gets so much better and so smooth and almost flawless! :D Mom and I did this wall in a dark shade of pink and it. looks. amazing.

The dark one! :D

3. The wall with the past water-seepage-problem, even after scraping and cleansing would already have patches and the fresh coat of paint will not disguise those. We painted it the same dark color at first, but the room had all dark walls then! One, I was already feeling anxious by completely changing the look and two, it wasn't as bright as before. And that was with just one coat! Later that night, one of those brainstormy awesome friends suggested mixing white paint in it to make it lighter. We had already done that, but it was still almost the same. But we could always mix more, right? In the end we ended up mixing another liter of white paint and then it came back to almost the same color as before. Three coats into it and it's still a little patchy on one side, but I can always make those designs on them! :D

4. You'd feel hungry. A lot.

5. You'd have your househelp coming in to see the progress whenever there's a commercial break from whatever serial she's watching, and commenting on every single question you ask while in a conversation. Even if it's a rhetorical question. But you'd laugh at it, because she's funny sometimes. ;) And she'd tell you genuinely which parts don't look okay and would say, 'yaar kitna mast lag raha hai na?' when it's a job well done! :P

6. Be ready to turn your hands and feet coarse with scrubbing while cleaning up, because your mom might not let you use turpentine oil since 'your skin is very sensitive'. :/ 

7. Wear old clothes that you can discard, in case the paint and stuff doesn't get off.

8. You'd start noticing how Berger Rangoli has an advertisement in between a cricket match and what other brands are into this business. You'd also notice wall paints and combinations in other people's homes.

9. You'd know for yourself the different kinds of paints, how it's okay to mix water with a certain kind if it's too thick. You'd also get comfortable talking to the hardware store wale bhaiya because despite being careful enough, you did need something more.

10. You're actually quite capable of doing what you said you'd do. It feels surreal but you'd be the one who did the upper walls. The parts above the tubelight. Like a boss! 8| You'd know you're awesome! ;)

11. Your mom would wait for you to finish this blogpost, restlessly reminding you that it's 'about time' we went ahead with the designing, and you would want to make her (and yourself) happy, so you'd just stop typing and go ahead. :P 

The final, pre-designed painted walls. :D

The Paintgirl Chronicles # 1: Creating bases

Hiya peepul! I'll make all my thoughts super direct in this post because I've attempted, unsuccessfully to write four different posts, all literary-thoughty-thoughty kind. I suppose I'm not in that frame of mind these days (months?), so I decided two minutes ago to just ditch it. So yeah, right. You know it's bad when it's already been like, four days into the autumn break and I did not even do a celebratory post about it. And it's bad because I love breaks and holidays, as the loyal gine chune readers might know, but I still didn't say 'yay'. Yes, I have this week off from college. And what did I do in the past four days? Lazed around. Totally. I did not read anything apart from some pending blogposts, a couple of pages from some book I took two days to decide to read, I wrote nothing, I haven't looked at the college notebooks (and I won't. I'll just see it once in the Metro on Monday morning). See? This is the level to which something sucky can affect you, that someone as strong as I was am would suffer. Anyway, I know I would grasp at anything if I have to, to be able to fully come out of this mental and whatever block it's given me, once I'm outta here. 

Till then, this is a new mini-series! And I swear it'll be a mini because it is on something I hope to be able to complete during the bache kuche dinn of my break. One fine day a few weeks ago while I sat staring at a wall with peeling paint in my room, dad came in to ask for something and I asked for his opinion on whether or not I could paste newspapers on the wall, not the boring kind, the funky kind, to make it more interesting and less of a sore. I suppose even he saw how mental his once-upon-a-time-awesome kid has become, and maybe he got into the generously senti parenty thingy and he asked if I would like to re-paint the wall. Myself. I mean! How cool is that? He could see I was incredulously happy and so yay! This is the thing that'd be making this short break worthwhile. Jeez. I was feeling so sucky since morning. I feel a million times better already! :D 

The Paintgirl avatar.
The real fotos looked too meh. -_-

Okay. Focus. This is part of the Paintgirl Chronicles. Obviously, I am the Paintgirl and no, you're not allowed to roll your eyes or laugh because I mentioned in the previous post how bad I am at naming. And Paintgirl is anyway better than the other names I've come up with. Anyway, *the awesomest drumroll ever*!

Making Decisions:

The 'supposedly' hardest part. I later on realized it's not as worth the hype as it is right now. Yes, decisions are important but if you're keenly interested and if it's close to your heart, those decisions are pretty easy and quick. Awesome, even. The harder part is later, while implementing. 

Anyway, gathering two of my closest friends (Hi dudezos!), we formed a brainstorming group to decide on the extremely crucial question: what color and design to settle on? Of course it had to be pink, so the pink-color-hater-friend decided not to think too much on the subject. The rest of us decided on a shade similar to the ceiling one, contrasting with the dark strawberry shade of the wall that's perfect. Designs were made on paper and whatsapped, colors of the designs decided. All went well, except for a minor katta because the pink-hater was supposed to come over for the painting, but then she had to leave for her hometown. Hello festivals! -_-

Pre-Implementation Preparations:

It wouldn't do well to suddenly stop the whole process just because you don't have an important material or something, right? Total mood dampener. So as a first step, you gotta do a short online research (where else?), googling stuff with the search-words, 'how to paint a room' and 'material required to paint a room'. I'd suggest you don't focus too much on the non-Indian search results. They'd mention 20 things you don't know the names of and we can anyway do a better job with the good Indian jugaad. Just be a smartass and take basic tips and leave the strict rules to them. 

Once you have a little knowledge, you'd feel like an awesome Paintgirl already (or Paintboy. Ugh, that sounds so.... :P ). This prior knowledge is important because you weren't born masons and painters and this would probably be the first time you'd be doing it yourself. I mean, I'm still not believing my parents actually don't mind my clumsy self doing a paint-on-the-wall-job. I haven't painted anything in my life, except maybe a house with a triangle top as a kid. And I'm free to even design it. *Dancing* Okay. Focus. 

1. Once you know how to go about it, make an Indianized version with your dad. If you go word for word by the angrezi version, the hardware store wale bhaiya would look at you pityingly, thinking you don't know anything. 

2. Make a list of things you'd need. 

3. See which of the listed things are already available in your home. Go to the store room. Full of junk. But that's useful junk! You'd most probably find half the things you need in there. 

4. Make one trip to a nice hardware store and get everything. Double check if you have everything because if you miss something, your dad's not going to go again and you'd have to paint pink with green. 

5. Prepare yourself mentally. You can't get ill, you can't back out, you can't think of posing and clicking photos because you'd have to know you wouldn't be dressed your best when you get to work. You have deadlines and you have to work hard to complete the job. 

Materials needed:

1. Paint (obviously :P ): I can't say what kind, because I didn't understand it myself. They talked about it like it was the most obvious thing in the world and I didn't care too much as long as I got what I needed. The one I have is an emulsion, though. And since I'm not cementing and making a whole wall from scratch, just repainting with a little scraping off, I don't need a primer either. Y'know, the base paint thing.  

All STUFF! 

By the way, did you guys know how you get thousands of shades in paints? This was SO new to me that I can't help sharing, even if it might be obvious to you. While I looked up shades in the shade card, I looked around the store to see hundreds of buckets of paint. But the shade card held thousands and I asked dad if they'd have what I needed. 'Of course', he said. Tentatively, I picked out one shade and watched as the guy went to a computer on top of a semi-circular heavy table. He found the shade, quoted the price and when dad said 'yes, we'll have it', he simply took off the lid of a one liter box with white paint inside and placed it under the computer, inside the semi-circular thingy which I realized was a machine. o.O And then he retrieved the box, shook it up, opened it and revealed that same pink shade! :O How cool is that? And to think I thought all shades are stuffed inside boxes already. It feels so obvious now. -_-

Apart from the main paint, you'd also need other paints for those designs you think you would make. I got some white, black, brown and green paint too, the kind which you can mix in proportions to get different shades of these colors! Eeep!! :D

2. Brush : To paint with. You could use a wide one for the walls and a relatively narrower one for making designs. 

3. Roller : Because just brushes might be for those actual wall-painter-guys. And rollers seem fun.

4. Turpentine oil : To clean paint off stuff that weren't intended to be painted, like the bed or the study table or the floor or your hands. ;)

5. Wall putty or P.O.P. : To fill in gaps in the wall to make them smooth. The hardware bhaiya suggested us P.O.P. as it dries soon and works well. 

6. Scraper and sandpaper: To make the walls smooth before repainting them. Get rid of the flakes and then rub sandpaper.

7. Miscellaneous: Rough cloths for cleaning, a cloth for covering your mouth and hair, plastic vessels for mixing paints and other such things. Also, a camera for your mom to click your pictures, but don't expect them to come out any good. :/

Getting started:

Finally, after all this was done, I stood looking at my room, trying to etch in my memory the way it looked, because it wouldn't be the same anymore. I clicked a picture of the two walls that'd have a darker pink, and probably a subtle design. I do get sentimental about this as well. -_- 

View 1.

I can metaphorically compare the crumbling, peeling-paint wall with myself. If I think of it as me, it's something that has been suffering for too long. The actual problem was fixed a couple of years ago, it wasn't just re-painted since then. Though in my case I'm fine on the surface, just need to be fixed from the inside. But we can overlook this for now. This wall is like me. I need to re-do it and make it awesome. 

The wall holds one bookcase, which had to be removed. I shifted the books to G's room and removed the bookcase with dad's help (no, you can't do it on your own because one, it is heavy and two, it needs screwdrivers and pliers and a lot of physical strength, which even a motivated Paintgirl would find hard to do). Then the bed was covered along with other pieces of furniture that stay in the room for now. The ladder was brought in and we covered ourselves and set to work. Now, those small scraping cards are sharp and you can cut your hands if you're not careful. Dad did most of the upper portions while I did the lower half, the layers and layers of dried paint falling on us. I seriously didn't care, I was so engrossed in this simple activity. Feverishly scraping off layers. The nasty things had to be peeled off. It won't have to suffer anymore, just get rid of everything that's troubling you. 

It took a couple of hours for one wall, which isn't even one wall, it's just half! Those couple of hours involved putting in plaster wherever needed. Have you ever mixed plaster with your hands? The powdery stuff is quite hot if you keep your fingers in them for long. Put in water and mix. Sometimes it feels like your hand is in a marshy swamp (a daldal) and if you're too into it, you might feel that one second panic, feeling like you're about to drown and never get out. But you realize it's just your hand and you can take it out. You use the scraper to fill it in holes and make the walls smooth. 

The base is ready now. You just have to let the plaster dry, and maybe you can make tiny sculpture flowers out of the plaster that's still left. I tried. It was a mess. I now have what resembles an uneven snake with a bloated stomach. -_- 

***

This has been the progress so far. I now look forward to tomorrow, when we'd be starting the actual paint! Yay pink! :D I've decided to make a plain tree on one side, and the three Divergent ravens coming out of the branches. I'll paint a quote too. And small white butterflies. All this is on one side and it would look cool and fun. I'm hoping to update on the progress day-by-day, just like it happens! :D If you've got any awesome design ideas, please share. There's still time to consider! ;)

PS- This work is much harder than I imagined. But I like it nevertheless. I love the doing-the-digging-and-dirty-work and then seeing the beautiful result. It feels awesome when you know everything about how it came into being. Just like the wall, I'm ready to be repainted. Myself. By my family members. With love. :)

The post with a lame name...

Names are important, considering how everything isn’t just ‘something’ and ‘this’ and ‘that’. You use these words when you don’t know what they’re called. Every ‘thing’ has a name, and when the ancient humans saw how ‘aye!’ can’t be used to call everyone, they started naming each other as well. I’m bad with names. Like with registering who is called what, which leads to weird situations sometimes, like the one time a familiar face said ‘Hi’ to me in the Metro and I knew she’s someone from my college but with no idea how she knew me. I managed to make a ten minute conversation, overusing ‘you’ and ‘aap’ with my mind whirring in the background trying to recall. Unsuccessfully. Now this is still pardonable because she was someone I might have acquainted with through some ECA society. But what about that one time in first year, just a few months into college, the teacher asked for ‘Sunny’ and I turned to my bestie:

“Who’s Sunny?”

*Weird look* “Err.. you do know he’s our classmate?”

Me: *squiggly eyebrows* “He is? Who?”

Bestie: *points a thin guy out, wondering if she made a blunder making me a close friend*

Me: "Oh. I umm.. forgot his name. Sorry.” *going back to daydreaming*

The fact of the matter was that I never even bothered to learn names, because if I could just see and know they’re my classmates, why bother? It’s anyway a taxing thing for my brain. But you see how it can lead up to awkward situations, in future, when I might be working? Because I’m totally a hypocrite when it comes to names. I absolutely love the feeling when someone calls me by my name, and that someone is someone I didn’t expect would know or remember my name. I suppose everyone does love it, because on a rare occasion or two, I have felt awesome when I did remember someone from the past and called them by name and saw the gleam in their eyes. Y’know, the shiny thingy that’s there for a moment? But anyway, this post is dedicated to my inability surrounding the genius entity called ‘name’.

I’ve sometimes frequently wondered how names were even invented. While I know how some names are so creative, derived from mythological kinda words and from other languages and everything, but how did it start anyway? Someone saw the sun and said ‘sun’? I mean yeah, it might have been called something weird in the ancient civilization days, but still. Look around, how is the shirt a shirt, a book a book, a laptop a laptop, a tripod a tripod, a mug a mug? (Yeah alright! I’m just naming stuff I’m seeing right now :P ) And these are just what you say ‘generic’ names, think about specific ones. How genius do they sound! Please know I’m not referring to ‘language’ over here, just names of things and people and countries and everything that has a name.

Let’s start with people. Without wanting to sound bashful, I have to say I love my own name. I love the fact that it is a word from a language I’m actually not familiar with, that it has a meaning that I feel like living up to, so that it makes just the perfect kind of sense. I love knowing people’s names, though that is a different matter I usually forget them very soon. But it’s cool when you listen to a name and you match it up with the person’s face and character, if you happen to know it, and then you tend to think of them as more meaningful people. Try it sometime! Some names absolutely strike me as unique and I remember them for longer, no matter forgetting whom it belonged to. I think Jhumpa Lahiri’s The Namesake is related to names too, though I guess it’s more about how people were running into problems because of their names. “I think” because I haven’t read the book, just the blurb once upon a time and I’m too lazy to check right now (lazy? Check, too busy with the meanie college that’s making my life so not how I wanted it to be. More of that later).

Anyway, yes there’s a huge probability that I wouldn’t remember your name if you’re in my college but not in my class (leaving aside a couple of exceptions :P), but maybe yes if your name’s weird (sorry. Some just are. Why are people these days naming their kids ‘Rhythm’? That’s just too weird, with a very weird connotation) or unique! That explains the new-ness in kids’ names these days. Tongue-twisty names I tell you. Makes it even harder for people like me to remember.  -_-

The next kind of ‘name’ that makes me squirm is a nickname. I know people who keep awesome nicknames! I may find them even more awesome because I know I can’t think like that myself, but they’re either really funny, or abbreviations of funny words that actually suit the nicknamed person. Such people, I really admire your skills. (Hint hint: Miss Ruya, I like the MDB :P And even though it’s tiny, I’m proud of making you make it into EMDB!) Nicknames are fun, mysterious to those who don’t know, which make them even more fun, and totally cool! If you still don’t know how lame a nickname I can make, consider how I call my Scooty, ‘Scoot’. Yeah. That’s the most creative name I could come up with. The parrot we once had? Parry :P I won’t oblige you guys with more such examples because that would be a threat to the readership for this blog!! The last example is how you call your sibling weird, disgusting names in various kinds of moods? My brother has always been creative when it came to calling me with absurd names. When I had to retort, I just replaced the initial alphabet with ‘S’, the initial for his name. How creative, right? -_-

I’m no good at naming anything. Events, titles for posters, titles of blog posts -_- I feel amazed sometimes with the creative names I’ve come across! Book-titles! I have no idea how I’m going to think of titles for my not-yet-conceptualized-book(s).

Why can’t I name anything? Maybe because I don’t really like ‘memorizing’ stuff? I have an okay vocabulary and even though I drool over words that sound awesome (and people who use awesome words in conversations), I can’t seem to use them myself because of the simple fact that I listen, register, drool and store it safely somewhere, padlocked. It doesn’t bother me a lot, though. And I don’t think it should, anyway. Even though keeping names is important. And while I do have this very solid, open fear that I’m eventually going to name my own kids Ashna-Junior and err.... Ashna-Junior2 (or maybe Harry and Hermione. Or maybe Little Lord Fauntleroy. Or Hedwig! No wait, I can’t name a kid after a white snowy owl. Or is it allowed?), I also am hopeful that I would have someone creative enough to think of a meaningful, nice name and make me see beyond Fauntleroy-type names, and then maybe one day those kids would write some random, weird post talking about how they love their name. Well, what else do you expect? I think they’ll write weirder posts and make me proud :P

See you in the next post!
Uhh.. alligators :P

PS- 

Hectic college, hectic college

When will you end?

I’m striking off days, hoping

What’s awesome is just ‘round the bend

No, I don’t hate you as much as it seems

But don’t be so cruel that it makes me scream

And write lame posts when at all I do

It’s what I love, please don’t spoil it too.

PPS- Whoa! I’m awesome at lameness. :P