Banging up and its benefits!

*Enthusiastic wave with both hands*

Hello readers! I'm finally back to my real, awesome self, back to being the girl who loves writing, specially here on this beloved blog, especially about my weird self and all the weirdness in the world. As of this moment, my face is in a unique contour, thanks to the overwhelming smile that's stuck there, making me look like a demented cousin of a baby seal. Trust me, you don't want to see what that looks like. Whoever says smiling always makes you look pretty has never seen me when I do it. Okay, maybe what I'm doing is an over-exaggerated version of what could be a smile, with all possible freaky add-ons, so that might not be wrong.

Yep. I'm back!

I do have those problems and minor irritations, but then, it's been quite a long time that I've been affected. I tried getting back by myself, but it wasn't working out. I wasn't even reading, imagine. But then! You know those times when you're so tired of trying, God finally takes mercy on you and bam! He's done something that benefits you in a way. Most of you might just think I'm nothing short of delusional to think what happened with me was good, but hey-ho, it is. ;) Yup, so on Thursday last week, for the first time in this college, we went through a think-like-a-kid bout and started playing a game we used to play as kids (I won't mention which one. It's actually very embarrassing to tell). In short, into the first game itself, my klutziness surfaced with full enthusiasm and while running I smashed into a big, cemented flower pot. Right next to the railing. On the third floor. And then people who saw me that time described it later as similar to a stunt as Superman might have performed, if that included getting your left leg hit the side of the pot and go flying over to the other side, rolling and sitting up, clutching your leg. That's what happened. Believe me, I'd love to go deeper into the details, but that's not the aim of this post. 

So I've been staying home since the past three days, thanks to my broken leg, because of which I can't walk straight (in the mornings? I can't even walk). I am supposing that this was God's way of shaking me, in a very literal sense! Because now that I think about it, this break was needed, the days I didn't go to college, stuff happened that I couldn't have handled had I been present and I got to know what amazing presence of mind and love my friends have for me! ^_^

Coming to the point (finally! :P ), I think whatever happens, we should look at the benefits. And trust me, getting banged up has its own share of advantages. Care to know? Read on!

1. You get to see the humane side of people, the side that's usually overshadowed by other unimportant stuff in our everyday lives. I got to know that whatever problems or tiffs people might have, they do feel concerned if someone's hurt. That's good to know! I was beginning to feel it's all about materialism, but humanity persists. Even if it's deep inside and hidden, it will surface sometime. You also know how amazing your friends are! (I've said that already, haven't I?). 

2. You get to be the pampered kid whose every whim and fancy would be adhered to. Not that I have any whims or fancies. I'm quite a sincere, obedient (ahem), oh-don't-do-so-much-for-me kind of a person and I do not like people looking at me with pity. But still, it sometimes feels good to be the center of attention, specially when it's your family and friends who're going out of their way (really) to make you feel better (even though you've told them a million times you're okay). 

3. You suddenly become popular among your rishtedaars who specially call to check on you and see how you're doing. So much so that by the time you realize who's on the line, you're already about the end the convo and hand over the phone to your parents. Did I mention I have phonophobia? The fear of having to talk over the phone. With anyone. I. Just. Can't. Thank God I can write at least, or else I'd have been a social outcast by now, what with not talking to anyone at all! Still, I can say 'Hello' and 'Thank you for your concern' and 'Mom wants to talk to you' (even when she's violently shaking her head, mouthing a big "Noo"). And it's always nice to revise who all you have as relatives and where they live. Just in case.

4. Teachers aren't too hard on you for homework and classes and all. Maybe they'll overburden me later when I'm okay, but what's wrong with enjoying this small privilege till the time it's available? Also, it must feel nice to having everyone (okay, most of them) take special care when they're around you, just in case you get hurt. Even if it's one percent, you have to admit, you do get special treatment. ;)

5. Since you can't do many physical activities, you get to sit comfortably all day in those warm, fuzzy blankets wearing the track suit which ironically, you wear on your morning/evening walks, with your laptop and the internet! As your plans of going to the World Book Fair were doomed (and believe me, to a book lover, it's devastating, specially as it looks so amazing this time and you know many more amazing books you wanted to look at), you're allowed to make online purchases for a few books! (Yayy!) 

6. Even though you're missing out on a lot of work in college, you don't feel like worrying over it and hence you take to doing fun stuff you had been missing. I'm back to reading and jotting down random stuff in my random-stuff-notebook (where else?), thinking of all the things I wish to have, all the places I want to go, all the fun stuff I want to do! 

7. Your Mom wouldn't ask you to do the usual chores. Anyone with a familiarity with the way our home functions would get the idea that I'm such a hypocrite and a liar. Because okay, I'm anyway not asked to do many chores because of the clumsiness thing and all-told you being a klutz is good-but still. Not having even to peep inside the kitchen, or being asked to pick up the landline, or to go over and switch on/off lights and stuff? Feels great! ;)

There are other benefits too, the little things like asking for chocolate and getting it in an instant (whoa!), getting an extra number of hugs (which I louvee) in a day, having little kids come to you for help in their homework (tuition!) and gingerly staying away from the hurt leg so as not to hurt you further. They're just so cute! ^_^ You are on your own most of the time (other people do have work, remember?) and that gives you ample time to daydream, listen to music, think about life and having philosophical thoughts (which I've been doing quite a lot lately. And it's fun). Oh yes, since I spent a lot of time online, I got to know another blogger Ruya Preetika, better. She is one amazing person, just 17 and managed to make my thought process on a very confused topic, clearer than it earlier was. Do hop on to her blog! I'm sure you'd love the chirpiness and candidness with which she blogs! She's also very kindly awarded this blog with a Liebster Award, the post for which I'd be making soon! :) 

See ya! ^_^

Now I think I'll go back to actually doing some homework (we have a hectic week next week :|) and as much as I loathe doing homework, I need to do it. And oh yes, that dreaded election is over and I'm now the new (and umm.. first) 'Literary Head' in the Student Council. *Takes a Bow* Thank you, Thank you. As much as I'd initially thought I'd just be adding on to my already unbalanced workload, I've still done it. Really, I can't even convince myself to not do anything I didn't want to do. But still, maybe it won't be that bad. Maybe I can actually have fun. For a change. *Hoping for the best!*

PS- That's Rapunzel in the two pictures. I love her. Ever since I know her as a kid! More so because my mom lovingly calls me Rapunzel too! (I've got long hair! :D )

Life as we knew it...

'Change', they say, is the only constant. I've never actually understood this line, so now whenever I hear it, I go, 'whatever that means'. But it still happens, right? There's change. More so when you're finally feeling comfortable and you don't want to move for a long long while, change will happen and begin a new process of 'adjustment' all over again. During a particularly boring guest lecture, I was reminiscing about the way life was when we were kids. (Not that I don't listen to guest lectures, but this one had exceeded the 'too boring' category) How it was so different from what it has now become. We were different. I guess it's because of the different ways of living (thanks to 'modernization') and because of the differences in our thinking as we grow up. Agreed? 

I'm yet again typing on impulse (I still haven't checked with a psycho-doctor for my priority issues :P) and I'll try to make it short as I want to get off the laptop to do important stuff like assignments (ahem). Okay, to read books. There, I said it. Happy to leave me embarrassed (not!)? 

1. Technology/gadgets

I'm going just 15-20 years in the past. OK, make that 15. I'm 20 and I'm pretty sure I hadn't started noticing 'life' as soon as I was born! Back then we had one landline phone set in a small shelf on a huge multi-purpose shelf and as far as phones go, that was that. The kids weren't supposed to pick up the phone if adults were home (which was always) and even if we did, we were made to learn basic 'phone etiquette' so that we wouldn't end up embarrassing our parents in case their boss(es) called. We turned teenagers and gawked over the Panasonic mobile handset that belonged to dad, very happy that we wouldn't again have to call up his office and have to listen to 'please wait while your call is transferred', whenever we felt like talking to him. And the best part? Everyone was always happy. No issues over missed calls, no fights over cell phones and we still stayed very well 'connected'.

Just thinking about the scene as it is now, gives me the shudders (the real ones, it's not just a phrase). Talking about how it is with us, who saw the landline phase and the entry of cell phones, I guess we're still handling it better (talking only about the sane ones). We all have our own cell phones now and personally, I feel we should get one only after school. It's such a distraction. I mean, yes, we do easily 'connect' and we have so many 'apps', those that can even count the number of steps we take while walking, but it doesn't mean we'll die without them. That's part of the reason why I'm still stuck to my basic Nokia. I just don't want my life to be dominated by a device that might just stop working tomorrow! I can't believe how we are so dependent on them now. As for the poor generation that's being manufactured born in the recent years, those guys have really been unfortunate. One, they see their parents so engrossed in cell phones that they want their own as soon as they start their 'boo baahs'. Tell me, don't you go all 'awww' when you listen to a young mom telling you how her 1.3 year old can effectively operate a mobile phone? I admit, I say 'nice' on the face too, but I actually feel disgusted. Do you even know how harmful it can be? 

Thanks to alarmingly huge developments in this field and due to the increasing 'trends' among kids and adults alike, kids as young as 10 years old own a Blackberry (I've seen!), gush proudly about how they spend their weekends on movies, trying different restaurants in malls and shopping. I'm not saying it's wrong, but why don't you take kids to parks and monuments, national museums, scenically beautiful places and natural wonders? But you get them playstations when they're hardly 5 (I've seen, again!) and then crib about how the kid doesn't do his homework. Puh-leez! People shouldn't be allowed to be parents unless they pass a test on 'effective parenting'! We're just creating machines, not people! The biggest drawback of this 'too-much-gadget-use' is the lack of empathy or 'people' skills they have. 

What's a life when you don't know how to think beyond your own self?

2. People, relationships and friendships

I'm almost on the verge of an angry outburst as I think about this. It's so sad! The external changes in the environment, in people around us, in our life, definitely bring a change in us. I'm not exactly the girl I used to be when I was in middle school, not like I was in high school, not like I was in college, maybe not even how I was yesterday (after a lot of thinking, I know it's true). We change, everyday. Most of it comes from the new way of living. We've found out simpler solutions and so we don't exert as much effort as we would have before. We don't mind sending kids for tuition even if they don't need it because everyone else is. We give expensive cell phones/iPads/iPods to our teenage children on their birthdays or just on days they get their report cards instead of that good old family outing and a toy they've been wanting forever! ('we' is a general term, don't take the pain of racking your brains trying to understand how I could have teenage kids :P) But then again, the kids don't want toys, do they? We've exposed them to so much of technology, they simply understand it as an imperative part of their lives. We've become more 'I-centric' than being 'We-centric' and we're just making our kids learn the same. 

Pic courtesy: Google ji!

Why have you ditched the joint families? Okay, don't live with everyone, but why move out from your parents' place? You don't live in the US or UK or other western countries. And don't tell me you actually don't miss their presence. Besides, your kids are missing out on the most important aspect in their lives-the love of grandparents! 

With simpler ways of living, we respected each other more. Relationships were formed not on the basis of the number of gadgets you have or the car you drive, but depended on what you are as a person. You said 'Hi' only when you meant it and got a reply with a warm and welcoming smile. You were happy, really, very happy. And then you decided that materialistic things were more important to you, that you could hit your kid easily if he made a scratch on your car's shiny boot. Really? Are you even human now? Just feel like sharing a personal example. I was small and loved to be creative. I loved crayons, paints, modelling clay, sketch pens and markers. And walls. I made a small drawing on a wall and turning back, saw dad. I guess I would have felt ashamed. But the next thing I remember, we had walls with scribblings (my younger brother would have obviously participated) and scratches and drawings done with crayons and pencils all over the room. It stayed like that for months! Or more, I don't know. The only restriction was that this activity was confined to one room- the main entrance, the drawing room. We had relatives from the US visiting us that time and one of them remarked a shocked 'What's this?', to which dad replied with a smile, 'Well, it's a drawing room'. :)

I heard this from mom while I was pestering her for incidents from the past. I'm willing to make a bet on the number of people these days would do this.

Coming to friends, it's relatively so easy to make friends as kids. We don't see how they look, what car they drive, where they live. We just see someone playing on the team we're put into and we're friends! Done!  We never ever think of what another would think if we make someone a friend, if we talk to anyone because we feel they have a lot to share that we'd like to know. It's simple and pure. And then we grow up and if we're some lousy 'Benetton-only-wearing' person, we'd probably be with similar people. We make friends strategically. Even bad, we like to make fun of people! (As if we're perfect our-self). We think we're superior and others are just stupid and not worth our time. Sometimes when we see another talking to someone, we wonder if they have any hidden motives. Maybe they're being friends because it'd be easier to do your work? Or maybe because they're interested in the other? Where is the 'we' of our past, where we never even considered such mundane things? 

Look around, there's a lot to see. People are good, and decent and simple. If they're handing out sweets randomly to our kid, it doesn't always mean they're thinking something weird. If they're just trying to talk/be friends, doesn't mean we over-think it. Stay cautious, but don't be harsh on the poor souls who might not even think that way! Grow up, but learn, too. 

Appreciate those who want you to smile. They're never the ones who'd ever hurt you.

The “Greater” creatures – Homo sapiens

Life is beautiful, or at least, it is supposed to be. We’re incredibly lucky that God chose to bless our souls with a human form. We’re living a comfortable life, being educated, building plans for a great future, investing our time an vigour into ‘creation’ – creating things, inventions, innovations promising to make our life even better. We have the power of controlling our minds that make us ‘intelligent’. We can talk, create, build homes, and build lives. We have the power to do almost ANYTHING!

As a human being, you have ‘greater’ powers than other creatures; why don’t you try to make life better for them too, other than just your own? God didn’t put us here on this planet to meddle with his creations. We’re supposed to live, to use those resources carefully and make living an enjoyable experience, for us and all other living beings. (Don’t get me wrong, I’m not asking you to abandon cities and start living in the middle of a forest on wild fruits and leaves!)

Think about it, aren’t you only concerned about YOUR family, YOUR business, YOUR job, YOUR habits and also, YOUR choices? Do you even care how it is affecting others? However rigorously you may shake your head from side to side, showing those big bulging eyes, I know you don’t. Even if you do, there is some motive; you will be getting something out of it, wont you? Only a few great souls like the beloved Mother Teresa can provide selfless love.

And it isn’t only about humans.  A situation that arose recently in our colony made me think about what people’s priorities actually are. Everyone wants to stay in their comfortable cocoons, troubling to get out only to shoo away something that’s troubling them.

It had been THREE days since the street dog (a bitch) had been stuck underground. Weird, you say? Well, there was this small hole recently dug at the side of the ramp* of a neighbor’s house. This dog was about to give birth and had gone inside this seemingly ‘safe’ shelter. That’s because another dog, from another lane, had killed all her babies previously; kyunki ye patli si hai and wo moti and strong, as the littlest kids tell me. Clearly, tragedies aren’t only prevalent in our lives. These creatures suffer tragically and endure all the pain in their strong strides. It doesn’t mean they don’t have feelings. Have you ever noticed a tear in a dog’s eye? You should, you’ll start loving life more.

Anyway, the poor dog had gone deep inside and while coming out with the pups, one of its legs got stuck in the mesh of underground pipes! It wasn’t able to come out at all, and it was SO deep, no one could even see (except with a flashlight). A day passed, people gave pitying looks to the rock solid ramp, some staring, as if they had x-rays fixed in their retinas, to see or wonder what the dog’s condition would be. I saw the kids being the most affected. They stood in shock, listening to the wails, trying to figure out a way to help. The second day, someone called the MCD (Municipal Corporation of Delhi) and as it is expected in a funny city like Delhi, we got a huge, magnanimous Fire Ambulance instead. The fire truck came, saw the situation and said, “Ye hamara kaam nahin hai, MCD ko bulao” (this is not our job, call the MCD) or wait for two days, it might come out on its own; and went away! With nothing to do, the people went and slid back into their comfortable homes, while the dog with the pups was stuck inside with a painful leg, in a stifling, watery hole, without food or water, wailing loudly. Night came and the wailing stopped. One could hear people murmuring, “now they’ll have to break open the ramp anyway to get the smell and the dead dogs out, poor people, kharcha aa jaega inka toh” (they’ll have to pay for the expense). Heck, doesn’t anyone care at all? You felt bad because the owners of the home would have to pay, not because a life (and probably four more) had to end in such an inhuman manner? But wait, why would you, those creatures aren’t human, right? For heavens’ sake, didn’t you see its companion, sniffing all around frantically, wailing, and probably trying to call her? Why was it running around looking under cars or in the staircases? It isn’t just you, who has a life. Respect other lives; anything can happen with you too. I felt terrible. Even though I was always against my brother and dad feeding them with milk and bread occasionally, since they were always running around our gate, I felt a deep sadness seeing the poor companion. I wished I could have helped.

The next day I returned home from college, and to my delight and satisfaction, I heard the dog’s wailing! It was alive! Not wanting to miss this chance, I immediately set out, trying to talk with the home owners who wanted the dog out. They were compassionate people, thankfully and ensured their full support. The chowkidars were called in and asked to break open a part of the ramp, a little away from where it was stuck. An opening created, the people peeked in and saw the stuck dog in defensive mode, trying to struggle to keep her babies close. A dog in distress doesn’t know you’re trying to help; and angry and dissatisfied as it was, it was dangerous at that moment. We decided to call an animal shelter, which could free the dogs and take them for treatment. They came, made another opening, in the course of which one of the two guys got bitten by the dog. Angry and agitated with the situation, they went away after tying close the dog’s mouth, so it wouldn’t bite.

In the meanwhile, people started complaining about the racket that was being created by the dogs and the thump-thump of the hammers against cement. They wanted the dog out so that they could sleep in peace.  At last, a middle-aged woman, who had been helping with the process the whole time, called her husband from work to help. He came within half an hour and with a few tricks, made a comfortable way to slice the pipe, without the danger of the dog biting. There was this man in Reebok and Dockers, sawing away at the pipe in the heat, to save an animal’s life. Wasn’t it amazing? 

Finally, after whole six hours since the process started, the dog was free. Some people fed it with milk and went away satisfied. Some others didn’t bother; they continued living in their cocoons, trying to make more money probably. It was both a happy and sad moment for me. I felt extremely self-satisfied and happy. Hey, we prevented a small universe from being broken. The dog was alive, and so were its babies. But what hurt was the attitude of the residents, who didn’t really care. After all, it’s only a street dog, they say. I wanted to ask them, what if it was (God forbid) a little kid? People would have gone gaga over the issue and the kid would have been back with his doting mommy within half an hour!

The world isn’t just about you. Learn to love, show sympathy and extend a helping hand. The intense satisfaction and pleasure you experience would be much more than what you get sitting home watching the stupid TV. You are a ‘greater’ creature, show and prove it too. Help others. Love life. Live life.  

*ramp- a slope usually made of cement in front of a house.

Unheard Wish.

It's not a perfect poem, but the words express the feeling.

Making a wish, "If only I had ..."
Every night I went to sleep

Without a care in the world,
I enjoyed those luxuries.

Until I came upon an unknown soul ,
The hungry eyes that followed me
I turned around and saw them,
still watching fixatedly.

I see her tear her eyes from me,
She glanced at her hands, black with soot,
Her dress, the color not distinguished
Her hair, black or brown, it was all so crude.


She turns to her mother, tugs at her sari,
Secretly pointing me out
The mother puts an arm around her and tries to assure her,
Maybe for getting a dress like mine,
I'm shocked at seeing the trustful smile,

I wonder if she'll be able to have one, and feel terrible, thinking
I just fought with mom to buy me a designer, while this girl
can only dream of owning a clean , pretty dress she's comfortable in.

I look at my shoes, annoyed because mom got them from the sale
I look at her, the plain rubber slippers with a most visible repair.

I look at the hut, bricks and thatch, family of five cramped tough,
no electricity, no place to clean
while I always wondered why my room isn't big enough.

I felt shameful, just looking at her and grateful for all,
since it is the best one could wish for. I promise
not to wish more but, to give more,
to them,who just wish for something small.

I pledge to help her, I try to smile ,
But she turns away and goes inside.
The next morning, I carry a bag, filled with stuff, clothes and shoes I don't need
any more, I reach the place, but the hut is gone.

I see them turning around the corner, the family of five,
The girl with a bag even lighter than mine,
Probably in search of another place to settle in,
Till the time some other policeman threatens to turn them in.

Quite the irony

We all seem to have 'learnt' at school how bad child labor is and how it poses a danger to children who have a right to live a decent and innocent life. But school lessons are just school lessons it seems, for the malice of child labor is as widely present as anything! Not that we alone can do much, but surely our minute efforts can make a difference. For instance, we can take a stand against employing  kids for our household chores. I'm sure there must be a horde of munnis and chotus in our typical Indian households. They can't help it because either they are forced into the work by their poor parents who seek additional sources of income or because they've seen enough problems at a young age to last a lifetime and they get into work.

This problem took a greater hold on me when I recently witnessed an example of young kids put to work.
I was on my way to college and while you've got a mere eight station distance to your destination, you can't do much except notice other people and during one of my people-noticing times, I saw a small group entering the metro- a lady holding a 2 and a half year old child, another woman(i guess her mother or m-i-l) and a small stooped figure. I could not quite make out the figure in ragged clothes and on closer examination saw that she was a girl, hardly eight or nine, bent with the weight of numerous shopping bags that weighed her down and that contained expensive stuff, which she was never destined to own, but carry, yes. A sad but true thing. What made me downright outrageous was how the lady pushed her impatiently through the crowd, barely noticing the impression that was being made on the girl's neck by one of the bags. And, how could anyone that seemed to be educated enough to know child labor is a crime, could go on about having a kid do the work of an adult , maybe more than that, while she cradled her baby lovingly and protecting her from the crowd.
Really, what an irony that is!